Tuesday, June 09, 2009
i guess its time to let it out.
at least i feel i'm more stable now.
2wks ago on 24th may 2am, my bunny left us.
this hits mi really hard.
i heard his last call for mi.
a moaning sound which drew my attention.
i turned and i saw him gasping for his last breath.
i lifted him up with my hands.
he was weak, soft, and he feels cold.
his breathing gradually stopped.
and then he left, right before my eyes.
it was painful.. far too painful for mi to take.
it had been a tough fight for bunny since a year ago.
he struggled through the whole year.
visiting the vet every week, living on medication everyday.
bunny was strong.
really, really strong.
i'm proud of him, cuz i can see he's fighting to live on, despite getting weaker day by day.
he's fighting to live for the sake of us.
i feel it, we really do feel it.
i cried for one hell week, since the day doctor cathy told mi to be mentally prepared.
i led my everyday with unease.
feared that when i woke up from sleep, bunny wont be around anymore.
feared that bunny didnt wait for mi to be back from work or play.
fear, everyday was filled with fear.
at the least, i'm glad that i was there to watch him leave.
8yrs with bunny, he's very emotionally attached to mi.
mummy said bunny was waiting for mi to be back.
indeed i do feel he wanted mi to be there for his last moment.
i'm glad i was home that night.
i did my part, i accompanied him, and i watched him leave.
life feels empty.
the things which i've been doing for the past 1 year, i no longer have to do it now.
i'm so not used to it.
i miss feeding bunny.
i miss giving him his medication.
i miss the days he circled around mi and followed mi everywhere i go.
i miss his touch.
how precious this little boy is to mi.
now when i step home, he's no longer in sight.
sometimes it really feels empty, empty without bunny.
bunny.. i miss you..
♥ bits and pieces of my memories.
1:00 AM
1:00 AM
